Life Imitates Art - Pain, Renewal & Great Sex
On the 1 year anniversary of Not The Plan, a look back & a peek of what's ahead
Today is the one-year anniversary of the release of Not the Plan. It’s the story of Isadora and Karim, my second published novel, but the first manuscript that I wrote.
Isadora is a perfectionist and doesn't realize that some of the problems she's dealing with are the legacy of having grown up with a mom with an undiagnosed mental illness. Karim is a man who is starting over from scratch after his marriage almost broke him.
First, the pain
It's been a weird year for me. Well, maybe not weird. It's been a doozy of a year for me.
When Not the Plan came out, I was one month away from my divorce being finalized. I was out of my mind with worry because the work that I had been able to find was not going to cut it from a financial perspective at all. And the entire life that I had before had exploded. I had held onto it tightly, tightly with both hands, terrified of what the future could bring. But at a certain point, I had no choice but to walk away from it.
What I've come to understand over the past year is that the health problems that I had been struggling with for a long time, the difficulties that I personally was having, were either greatly exacerbated by or entirely caused by that relationship I was holding onto for dear life. When it all blew up in my face and I thought the world was over, I had no idea of what would be coming for me. One day after I got divorced, I started a new job as a high school English teacher here, which was something that I would never have imagined doing when I stepped off the plane in Paris in 2006.
It has been a wild ride in terms of work and continues to be, but I am cherishing the relationship with some of my students and growing in that role every day. On the personal front, when my marriage exploded, not of my volition, I was certain that I was going to be alone for the rest of my life because who could want me and all the problems that I have. I didn't have a lot of hope.
However, over this past year, as I began to heal and as I began to come back to myself, I came to realize that everything falling apart was the best thing that ever happened to me.
And that's the same thing that happened to Karim in Not The Plan. He held on very tightly to a relationship that was harming him, and then when it all exploded, not of his own volition, he spent an extended amount of time growing and coming back to himself.
As he did, and he started all over in California, in a new job, he happened upon someone who changed his perspective entirely.
Then the Renewal
As life sometimes imitates art, I too can say that over this past year, once I started following my personal interests, things that I thought that I would never be able to do, I too came across someone who has been immensely supportive and has helped me develop into a more authentic version of myself. And I'm just going to say it, I just have to brag here. I am now having the best sex of my entire life.
I didn't think there was anything wrong with what was happening before. It was actually quite enjoyable, but this, completely different. And of course, it does not hurt at all that we share a lot of the same interests and goals and very similar work experience.
And when I was signing those divorce papers, I definitely didn't think a man more than a decade my junior would approach me with interest. So shout out to things turning out in ways that you could have never imagined for both me and Karim.
If seeing that arc interests you, I would highly advise reading Not The Plan.
So What’s Next?
The other thing I've been working on over this year has been the story of Mo and Jess, which will be book three concerning the Sarda brothers. And no, they are not a series you have to read one, two, and three in order, but you can.
Mo and Jess (the title's changed a couple of times, so I'm not going to share it just yet) will come out in 2025. We don't have the exact pub date yet.
Mo is a highly sensitive person, which is being considered more and more to be a form of neurodiversity. And because of his high sensitivity, also known as sensory processing sensitivity, Mo seems to the world to be grumpy and angry and mean and closed off, when in fact Mo is an extremely kind and caring and loving person who is happy and content as a single father to his daughter after a divorce.
Life imitates art. I started writing about a divorce before I had one. Okay.
You can get a glimpse into Mo in Getting His Game Back, my first book, which came out on January 25th, 2022.
I love Mo. I love me some Mo.
From the outside, he seems unapproachable, but in fact, he feels things very, very deeply and has to take certain steps to protect himself from being overwhelmed.
Highly Sensitive Person or Sensory Processing Sensitivity is not a medical diagnosis that can be determined by a blood test. But the description fits me. The description fits my father. The description fits my son.
So there's a little genetic component there. And it may be a form of neurodiversity. The jury’s still out. Because of my experience and the experiences of my loved ones, I thought it would be great for the world to see what highly sensitive people can look like.
In this third book, Mo and Jess are developing a relationship. She lost her sister to intimate partner violence, and she's having to start over as well, in a way.
She's an archer, he’s a blacksmith. They are working together to save a traditional skills folk school that they participate in from closure by putting on a Renaissance faire. So if those things are your jam, feel free to keep an eye out here and my other socials for the publication date.
And Growth
All this to say, like Karim, like me, you never know. You might be certain that your world has come crashing down, that life that you had before may very well be over. That might be 100% true.
But at the end of the day, it might be for the very, very best. That doesn't make it not hard. That doesn't make it something that is easy to cope with.
But what it does mean is that there's an opportunity for renewal. There's an opportunity for you to rise like a phoenix from the ashes. And there may be an opportunity for you to have some amazing orgasms.
Be well. And buy my books.